Go to Andrew Ganley Homepage
A True Story

The judge found him guilty, banged to rights,
He has a learning disability,
His crime was pilfering tights, stockings and underclothes,
Foundation garments and pantyhose,
Stolen in daylight from under the nose,
Of old ladies in rest homes, the motive ? .. who knows !
And sentencing him to 6 months repose,
The she- judge said,
You should serve proper time, this is not a victimless crime,
Those old ladies didn’t care for your beady eye,
Perusing as if at a bring and buy,
Their smalls and their frillies, you’ve no alibi,
So it falls upon me to make an exemplar,
For your rummaging through drawers of those with dementia,
Why didn’t you go to Marks and Spencer
So passing the sentence I can’t be fair,
Despite exemplary conduct in office as Mayor,
Your chain and regalia no longer befit,
A man of your nature , a lingerie bandit,
So don’t plead for mercy I cannot acquit,
It’s a custodial sentence take him away,
The luncheon club can rest easy on this just day.